FTS

Since nobody reads this shit, ill just let it all out here tonight. Why do i stopped blogging? Where does all the fun stuffs and stories go to nowadays? To A GIRL! I told everything to a girl!She's. the only one i want to tell, and after i tell her, i have the sense of satisfaction and that is why i never bother to fill them in here anymore.


But guess what? Why the fuck am i back here today? YES! BECAUSE NO ONE IS LISTENING TO THIS SHIT TODAY. I have no clue how a person can be so fucking selfish with their mood sometimes. Why is it that, when i am so fucking tired, and yet i will do whatever it takes to make someone feel comfortable before i leave them to sleep, and when the time i am feeling fucking down, all i get is ME SOLVING MY OWN PROBLEM because you are too tired and need to get some sleep. DO I NOT EVEN DESERVE TO BE CARED AT ALL WHEN YOU ARE TIRED? AM I BEING SELFISH FOR ASKING FOR JUST A LIL ATTENTION OR WORDS OF CARE WHEN YOU ARE TIRED?


I ALWAYS HAVE MY PLANS AND I HAVE TO CARE ABOUT EVERYBODY'S FEELINGS! WHENEVER I WANA DO SOMETHING, I AM TOLD WHAT I SHOULD DO! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK THIS IS? MESSING UP MY BRAINS, TELLING ME WHAT I DO IS WRONG, INDUCING GUILT IN ME FOR THIS N THAT. SOMETIMES YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT I HAVE MY THOUGHTS! AND THAT MY DECISIONS WERE MADE WITH QUITE SOME CONSIDERATION! I AM NOT YOUR SIBLINGS OR FRIENDS WHO NEEDS TO BE TELL WHAT TO DO COZ YOU ARE SO FUCKING RIGHT! 


I THINK AND WORRY AND CARE ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL DAY AND NIGHT AND FUCK THIS IS WHAT I GET AT THE END OF THE DAY. IS THIS A WAY TO EVEN TREAT A HUMAN? YOU ARE FUCKING SERIOUS WHEN YOU SAY YOU TREAT UR DOG BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE. NOW I GET IT. YOU MEAN IT FOR REAL.I SHOULD HAVE SEE THAT COMING


if you happen to read this don't get hurt, because this is not meant to be read by anybody. I just need a space to let it all out. I got no one to talk to. I've restricted myself to open up my emotions to you, and now,


i build my own trap and fall on it.


points to ponder:


We get into a relationship so that we have a company for the ups and down.


If so, what do you call it when you feel like shit, and you still have to solve it alone ?


I FUCKING HATE THIS FEELING RIGHT NOW!


Sleeping it away tonight.


Thanks.